Don't Fear the Reaper

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

L's bff, The Gamblor, was here over the weekend and adventures were had.  Saturday night The Gamblor and I stayed up late chatting about all kinds of things, including irrational fears.  His irrational fears are falling off a cruise ship and getting hit with a jump rope by people who are jumping rope at the gym.  (Note: he's never been on a cruise, due in large part to this fear.  This same fear does not extend to vessels of any other size, which is important to note, as he has owned a boat before.) 


Over the years, several of us have repeatedly explained that it's pretty much impossible to accidentally fall off a cruise ship, and he's slowly coming around to understanding and accepting this, but the fear still remains for the time being.  The jump rope fear is newer for him.  I have no details to add, as it's pretty self-explanatory. 


I have fears, but I don't know that any of them are irrational in the same way that The Gamblor's are.  I mean, I hope I don't get hit by a jump rope in the gym while it's in use, but I'm not so afraid that I won't use the weight machine that's closest to where the jumper is jumping.  Lord knows I survived getting slapped in the arm with jump ropes plenty of times during elementary school p.e. classes (and they were those jump ropes that have the long, plastic bugle beads on them, so it stung extra bad when you accidentally got hit).  I definitely have a somewhat debilitating fear of roaches and spiders that are bigger in size than a dime.  In my last apartment in Austin, there were two occasions where I ended up on the phone with L for roughly 30 minutes (okay maybe longer) so that he could talk me through slaughtering a roach.  Luckily for me, on the second occasion, my friend Mosie was already on her way to pick me up to take me to the airport, and being the bug killer that she is, she just used half of a paper towel to pick up and squish it (yeah, sick.  I died a little bit watching her but was simultaneously so proud and so in awe of her).  I just can't handle that crunch of crushing bugs and I HATE IT when they are large and leave a mess behind.  I also hate that when you spray them with bug killer, their instinct is to fly at you.  Oh and in case you are wondering, I made it to the airport on time but I was totally flustered and perspiration-y due to the roach incident.  Something like that might cause me to have a heart attack someday (in my defense, the roach appeared dead and did not move AT ALL when I uncovered it.  Then when I went to try and kill it with spray- while wearing rubber gloves and brandishing the biggest wad of paper towels you've ever seen- it FLIPPED OUT AND RAN AT ME.  Stupid roach).  Also, for the record, I lived on the ground floor and those were the only 2 roaches I ever saw in that apartment during the 2 1/2 years I lived there.  Just don't want y'all thinking I'm the trashy, dirty girl with a roach infestation.

As I type this, I'm reflecting on the fact that I recently informed all 5 of you about my fear of watching Home Alone or any other potentially scary movie or TV show by myself at night.  Perhaps that counts as irrational fear, as there is literally no reason to be afraid of Kevin McAllister's zany antics and his plight to save his home.  So maybe that's my irrational fear.  Scary movies and TV shows.  I have another one to add to the list: freaking Unsolved Mysteries, which I just learned APPARENTLY is still a show with new episodes!!  I mean Robert Stack is just eerie with his monotone narration.  Plus, add the menacing music and you've got a nightmare waiting to happen.  If you want to learn more about the new show or just scare yourself silly at work, peruse the website here.  If you just want to reminisce about the old version with the creepy music and Robert Stack, watch the YouTube video below.



In case you're wondering, L is apparently superhuman and has no irrational fears, or so he claims.  I think it's quite likely that he probably has some kind of irrational like, dislike, or belief of something, though.  I've tried to think of what my friends' irrational behaviors are and off the top of my head, it's mostly stuff like fears of riding horses and some other things that I'm realizing I won't share because the more I think about it, these things would just make them sound racist and they really aren't in real life.


UPDATE: I just searched Google with the phrase "falling off a cruise ship" and found this article on how to react if you should find yourself in such a situation.  I feel compelled to share it.  Please take special note of numbers 2, the last sentence of number 7, and number 10. 

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